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COLLEGE DORM SURVIVAL COOKING
The Rules were simple, like everything else in a college dorm...  Breakable…They launched the first annual college dorm cook-off.  These rules were mainly for leveling the playing field.  And keeping the cooking secret from the house mouse.   They were also for safety and not burning down the dorms.   Here are the rules.

Disclaimer And Basic Food Rules

• Only one pot (5 Quart) and one hotplate allowed, Microwave OK and Toaster OK for support.
• No wood or furniture fires, nor burning the room or dorm down.
• No tossing food or cooks off the third floor dorm with fraternity mates hoping to catch some on the fly, no extra points given.
• Hotplates may not be left unattended or you will be disqualified.
• Faculty will not judge this event as they are not invited. Besides, the faculty would call the school police.
• The heat source must be a one burner hot plate.  anos, hickory logs or effigy bonfires are not allowed. 
• You are allowed one meat, chicken or fish item. Pre-cooked or uncooked.  Everything else must be from a can, packet or frozen goods. 
• One pot over a hotplate with restricted food entries. I decided after prodding by my young Patawan friend to help her create this dish for her entry. I was surprised, it really tasted good and was simple. It would be perfect on a cold day.  The problem was what to call it.  It had the Chinese Ramen with Chicken with a decidedly Italian sauce. 
• “ Fun Dung Chow Italiano” was the winner.  This new event required the use exclusively with Ramen noodles.  
• NOTE: No students were poisoned, or died from some of the concoctions dreamed up at this great culinary event. We did lose several lab rats they tried some of their dishes on.

Ingredients

• One (already cooked) Sam’s or Costco Roasted chicken.  Autopsy it in fine pieces,
• Or you may substitute  three large cans of cooked Chicken. Sam’s or Costco,  
• Medium to large onion
• Diced, couple garlic cloves.  For the contest we used dried Onion and Garlic. 
• Three or four packages Ramen noodles and pitch the powder packages. 
• I use Knorrs Pollo Broth Instead, better flavor or 2  Cans Swanson Chicken Broth  
• 3  Cups water, the broth makes up the difference, plus liquid from the tomatoes
• 2  Cans Diced Tomatos (Hunts)
• 2  California Mix Frozen Veggies by Birdseye in a package
• 1  Can Rotolo Diced Tomato with Chillies
• 1  Can Tomato Paste (Hunts - small size)
• 4  Bay leaves
• 3 0z-  Crushed Jalopena Potato Chips on top as crust

Add the usual no salt, it’s in the broth,  Black pepper, and a few Red Pepper Flakes ( they are fairly hot, be cautious).   Feeds at least four to five gorillas and possibly six if your football team is underweight. 

Extensive Cooking Directions  —  Cook the Ramen Noodles in the water, broth, powder and a splash of oil, saut’e the onions and garlic, add the pre-cooked chicken till hot, add the whole mess of other ingredients one at a time, and stir and simmer, stir and simmer, for an hour and a half. 

Season to get the right heat and taste with the peppers and you can push a minced Jalopena peppers less their seeds and white pith,  if you think the dorms folks like that flavor.  The dried red pepper flakes should quell any macho appetites and cauterize their esophagus. 

Use the potato chips crushed on top. Serve with 1- Domestic Beer  2- Imported Beer   3- Romulon Beer from Kirks personal supply, as served on The Big Bang show. 

College Dorm Kosher Pizza - Survival Cooking  —  

While most of the other college contestants were busy trying to stuff Gange, Marijuana, Weed, Grass, Pot, Indo, Ganja, Wacky Tabacky, Mary Jane, Chronic, Hemp, Bud, Herb, Peyote, Reefer, Goofy Boots and known by 87 other names into cookies we went another route.

PIZZA! The National Dish of College Campuses!
Three ingredients made this the easiest and most legal snack of all the entries and really required little or no work or effort, perfect for college kids who’s main energy is usually directed toward sports, team alcoholism, and copulation. 

You will need Al’s Spaghetti pizza sauce offshoot, or any pizza spices from McCormick, at most grocery stores and Good fresh bagels or english muffins and White American cheese or a two cheese mix , You may add the following:

Pepperoni,  Mushrooms, Onions, Sausage,  Bacon, Extra cheese,  Black olives,  Green peppers, Pineapple,  Ham, Spinach,  Bacon bits, Garlic cloves…  or any thing else small enough to fit on that won’t cause eminent death or paralysis.  

Notes  —  And Suggestions  —  

The Bagel, well, plain is good, variants are good like whole wheat, garlic and so forth BUT old ones from two months ago with mold are not good.

For the cheese we used a commercial size pack from Sam’s which is a blended Swiss and American.  Mild it goes with anything, imitates very expensive pizza cheese and can handle heating and melting well. It was very inexpensive bulk packed, sliced and ready to go. When you make 50 of these bagels, bulk and pre-sliced was the way to go.  

The Sauce -  Al’s perfect Spaghetti  pizza sauce, is the best BUT in the dorm PREGO won hands down, we used the meat PREGO, fairly mild and sweet, added half a small jar of hot Salsa for bite and two tablespoons of Spaghetti Blend Herbs commonly found in grocery spices across the nation. Made a great Pizza sauce. I’m using it on big pies I make.

Two Minute Cooking  —  

The key to cooking for groups is the assembly line and here’s how we made fifty samples…

Cut bagels in half, place into toaster for medium toast. Keep them (all five) toasters going…

Remove and place the bagels face sides down, take a 1/4 of the slice of cheese and cover the hole on one side of the two slices, this prevents drippage or sauce on white shirt syndrome.

Cover with the sauce, over the cover part too, generously but not insanely. 

The amount dripped onto the floor will indicate correction, usually less the amounts in the following mini-pies.

Place two pieces of cheese in a Jewish star pattern as shown over the sauce and into the Microwave for 30 seconds to melt the cheese —  Note: You may cut the cheese ( sounds ominous) julienne style for a more authentic look, no penalty points.

More Notes  —  For those attending the Hebrew University, it is not official but this dish might be considered Kosher safe or kosher inspired looking by your Jewish classmates… because of the star of David.  You can get the cheese, bagels and sauce Kosher easily modified to personal tastes and culinary beliefs.

Diversity  —  Beats spending twenty dollars for Dominoes  Hunger Homies  Jabah the Hut Home and Your Papas John delivery…… for something thats old and cold  by the time it gets to you.

I wish you could taste them, this is a little killer combo. 

I’m doing a party next week and will probably make twenty different varieties for the fun of it…at the party as a gaf.  

I’ll use the oven and do twenty per tray with al kinds of goodies like Chicken and Pineapple,  Pepperoni with Feta Cheese, millions of combos.

EDIBLE McRIBS FOR THE DORM — 

Bon appétit with meat restructuring and no Mickey Dee Bullsh*t…

Let The Truth Be Known, Let Your Stomach Prevail  —  The Mc Donald McRib made its debut in the US in 1981 as a limited-time item; then, as now, it returns to the menu for promotional periods. 

It was developed by McDonald's first Executive Chef Rene Arend, who had fathered Chicken McNuggets in 1979.

“The McNuggets were so well received that every franchise wanted them,” said Arend in a 2009 interview. “There wasn’t a system to supply enough chicken. We had to come up with something to give the other franchises as a new product. 

So the McRib came about because of the shortage of chickens.” Note: If you believe that crap, I still have the Water Rights under the Brooklyn Bridge for sale. Who writes this corpo crap?

It was Arend’s inspiration to shape the McRib patty “Like a slab of ribs,” despite the fact that a round patty would have been cheaper to manufacture and serve on standard hamburger buns. NOTE:   More BS, it was his idea to make people thinks they were getting real ribs) : 

Despite McRib's notoriety in modern fast food culture, the sandwich wasn't immediately successful. It test-marketed very well in the Midwest, and was added to the restaurant's permanent menu for the United States in 1981. Sales were mediocre, however, and it was removed in 1985 as McDonald's executives determined that pork is not eaten frequently enough in the US to stay on the menu. 

After several years, it returned for a promotion. The sandwich is more popular in Germany, where it remains a permanent item. Lots of pork is eaten in Germany.  Most of their entire diet is pork, goose, geese, goat and beer.

Not A Fan Anymore  —  This McDonald’s McRib sandwich used to be a favorite of mine before I knew what was in it.  Now I classify it alongside their undercooked Frickin Chicken Sandwich and McNuggets, another processed ingredient laden concoction direct from McDonald labs which recently upgraded to “ All white meat”, it does not say breast meat, it says white meat, and processed. If you bleach dark meat, it’s what meat, I believe nothing McDonalds says.

The McRib is reportedly made of "restructured meat products" and a flour-bleaching agent used to make the soles of shoes. To me ROADKILL is a "restructured meat product"  and again it is being offered at all their stores. 

McDonalds' McRibs do have a certain popularity as they only offer it at certain times of the year. Usually Holiday times as the availability of certain products and by-products may be abundant.  It’s Ham cooking time and plenty of ham parts are available to be restructured.  

The basis of the sandwich is a questionable pork content patty, sloshed in barbecue sweet sauce, mixed with sautéed onions and a few pickle slices for the vinegar taste, and served on a plain Hoagie style bun. This is a good taste made in the science lab of the corporation and as phony as that stupid clown is…

You want great taste. See my recipe for McJacobs Ribs below, stay home, eat good, simple to make, and a hit with friends…

CUSTOMER COMMENT  —  My husband and I had our one and only McRib in the early 1980s, and we still joke about how the meat looked like it had been stamped out by machine.  “It is definitely a compressed meat product,...”. Who cares? MickyD doesn't sell food anyway.  Thankfully, we have a few places in EC to get real food. I've never had one, and probably never will as I prefer meat that hasn't been pre-masticated and then smashed back together.

THE REAL MANLY MC-JACOBS PORK BARBECUE SANDWICH

√ Made WITH REAL PORK and Fresh Products and Feeds The Team, Serves 4 or 20      
√ A Football Favorite… No Clowning Around

• 1  “ Sweet Onion from Publix - I usually add another, love Vidalia’s
• 6+ Mt. Olive Bread and Butter Pickle Chips per sandwich from Publix
• 4  Hoagie Rolls by Publix
• 1  Fresh two pound Pork Loin devoid of fat and any gristle. Sam’s Club, Publix and Costco
• 1  Cup Sonny’s Sweet barbecue Sauce at Sam’s/or Publix
• 2 Tablespoons Apple vinegar from Publix
• 2 Tablespoons Kikkoman Soy sauce from Publix
• 1 Teaspoon sugar to Caramelize the Onions (optional)
• Also you need the usual Chicken Broth about a half carton can, Salt and Pepper to taste.

Preparation  —  

I sliced the onion into circles and then halved them, placed them into a 1 quart saucepan, with a touch of sugar, margarine or butter, add an ounce or two touch of chicken stock to keep soft not fried, and when they clear, add the Sonny’s, the apple vinegar, touch of the soy sauce and stir, additional pepper if desired. 

The Soy, Stock and Sonny's have enough salt. Lower temp to idle. And pour into a long tray, a baking pan is fine if you are making many as I do for those great football days on the boob tube. 

I trimmed any gristle or fatback off the loin meat and cut the loins into 8-10 inch long pieces placed it between two sheets of heavy saran wrap and beat it to death with my meat tenderizer using the end with the points.  I out right flattened them to less than 1/2 inch thick about 3/8 inch and large enough to cover the hoagie.   

Very lightly pepper both sides and then seared the filets in a large frying pan I let them finish in the pan with a little chicken stock to keep them moist while you assemble. They cooked in about five minutes.

I toasted the Hoagie rolls or the microwave for 25 seconds, I took the filets and ran them through the sauce and onions, dribbled a few extra onions on, and added the pickles.  

Folks who have had this went nuts and actually seconds. My friends are good eaters.   Serve with Cajun potato chips and Miller Lite, or Heinekens, Budweiser or Coors heavily chilled in a bucket of Ice.

SURVIVAL SERIES - WINTER  DORM SOUPS  —                                        

A Mutt For Food  - Throw Togethers  —  Having grown up in an Italian-Jewish neighborhood in Brooklyn and having a friend whose Dad owned the local pizzeria and meatball sub emporium, I probably changed my blood type to “O” Positive which stood for Oregano Positive for sure.  

I had so many Italian friends ( I’m Jewish) I was made a member of the “Kosher-Nostra” early in life.  And this led to my love of Italian food and the rich culture and diversity from which I learned a lot about cooking. And a lot about eating and this soup like most of the red sauce soups [tomato base or flavored] can help you loose weight.

No, it is not authentic Italian, this dish is a conglomerate made from leftovers and odds and ends I tend to accumulate. So I had some stock, meats, I added fresh vegetables, a little sweet wine and a large pot because everything is a throw in. The bigger the pot, the better your aim and miss less! 

Purpose  —  I’m a widower ( I lost my wife to cancer) but I do take care of someone who went through a Stem Cell Transplant (took over fourteen months) and came out of the hospital at 102 pounds down from 130.   Within four months I got her up to 128 1/2 through better eating, saturated whole foods, and vitamins.   

Her blood work today and overall health is excellent.  She, a friend of my late wife and I,  have known each other for 35 years and she has passed the six year mark, August 13 will make seven years clean as a whistle. Cooking for those on chemo is tricky and breaking old microwave habits sometimes trickier.  I am working on a book or E-book called Chemo Cooking… This is what I made from leftovers

We Need Stock To Start And The Holy Trinity  —  

• A large 5 to 8 Qt. Pot filled with 6 cans / cups of chicken stock or I use KNORR commercial stock mix I buy at Sam’s or Costco’s, also at GFS in the large tub (I use a lot of stock). 
  
• Two bags of Sam’s Vegetable Medley from the frozen foods dept.
• One whole celery plant [6 sticks] diced to 1/4 inch sections either straight or on a bias.  Leave just a few of the leaves, diced very small and pounded for flavor. 
  
• A green pepper, sliced or julienne.
• Two large sweet onions (Visalia Sweets) also 1/4 inch and cooked with the celery.
• One bag carrots, I had some julienned so I used them, usually I have round sliced carrots I cut myself , bagged OK for those who value fingers.
• A half cup of raisins for sweetness
• And a criminally huge amount of garlic.
• Season with salt and pepper.
• Cook the veggies, till softened and should look like picture as shown above.  Any additional salt or pepper to taste as needed.
• Then anything can be added, Chicken chunks, Shrimp, Pork Meatballs, anything…

The Holy Trinity Health Point  —  

A common use of these vegetables in combination used in Gumbos and Stews is the basis for many of the dishes I make.  This way you get more veggies in your meal, the stock is holding all those good vitamins and sometimes the only way you can get kids to get their veggies.   

• In the Southern states, Louisiana in particular,  a combination of carrots, onions, green peppers, celery makes up what they call the Trinity or the Holy Trinity.  
• The Cajun holy trinity, or Louisiana Creole is a variant of the mirepoix: Onions, Bell peppers, and Celery in roughly equal quantities. This mirepoix is the base for much of the cooking in the regional cuisines of Louisiana.
• The importance of these three vegetables is indicated by the reference to the “Holy Trinity.” The mostly Catholic French Cajuns’ mean this allusion as a sign of the respect due to the place of onion, celery, and bell pepper in Cajun cookery. Garlic is sometimes added to the trinity, and green onions and parsley are generally sprinkled on top of a finished dish.  
• Even when a Cajun is cooking a dish that is not typically Cajun, such as spaghetti sauce, they generally use onion, celery and bell pepper.
• Using a combination of three major ingredients as essentials in any cuisine is not particular to Cajun cooking:   Mexican cuisine uses rice, beans, and chilies.  Greeks uses olive oil, lemon juice, and garlic.  Italian cuisines would be lost without tomatoes, garlic, and basil.  Chinese cookery often contains onions, soy sauce, and rice.
• It also combines the soup and entree into one course for faster eating and less dishwashing.  Try this, put in front of your kids a plate of vegetables and a hamburger on another plate.  You will get the point.  Most pass on the veggies.  This could be the reason Chinese children are basically healthy, their veggies are enclosed with the dish.  No picking and choosing, and most dishes I make contain flavored chicken, meat or shellfish stock, a thickener, and seasoning vegetables.  

Ingredients I Add To The Soup Base —  

• Two small cans of mushrooms since I had them handy.
• One half mild jalopena pitted and de-pithed, washed well, diced fine
• One can Okra pieces in tomato sauce
• Two small  cans of tomato paste.
• Two regular size cans of Tomato Diced, liquid and all.
• One or two tablespoons of  Italian Seasoning
• Leftover - I had an open package, a half pound of sweet  pork sausage and cut medallions from all four which just filed my smallest pan.  I browned both sides so when they go in the dish they won’t fall apart and become mushy like a chili. They hold up better, add the sausage to the pot. 
• Leftover - I had four cooked drumsticks left from huge chickens we had at a party and cut the meat off the bones, chopped them and then into the pan I just used for the sausage, with the drippings and pan fried them soft, and added them to the pot.  
• One cup of any white or red wine you like.
  
• Leave the stew (it’s more than a soup) on the stove stirring occasionally till it cooks down or reduces about 10-12%.  Heaven…   Cook till things meld together and should look as in the 2nd picture

Optional —  Go For It!

• This made eight Tupperware  or GLAD containers of a very hearty and flavorful soup but there is one more ingredient that we added.  
• In my fridge, I had a five pound bag of precooked frozen meatballs. 
• Each container got four meatballs on the bottom and then the soup over it to cool . Then we sent them off to the fridge.
• The meatballs were the last part of the Trifecta, made up the name we had in the restaurant for a leftover throw together. We called it Rock Soup.  Meatballs, Chicken and Sausage and there were eight of the GLAD containers, I ate the eighth one. 

Sorry, not picture perfectly symmetrical but delicious even if it is missing from the photo.

There is nothing written in stone here recipe wise, this is just what I call primal basic good food. Simple cooking and a way of getting veggies into people.  

But when the guys come over for Football, this is one of their favorites alongside or instead of the usual wings and pizza.  And Im not cleaning up chicken pieces from the carpet. 

There is nothing in this recipe that isn’t good for you and since we don’t drain or strain. The vitamins and minerals stay intact. The smaller amounts of meat provide proteins and the rest speaks for itself.  No bread, just good wholesome veggies and plenty of them…

Serving Hint  —   I take one of these containers, and just by adding some additional stock either meat or chicken based it will easily feed two.  Parmesan Cheese sprinkled on top, served with bread usually a topped Bruschetta, a Focaccia, Ciabatta or simply any hard bread on the outside, soft on the inside for dipping with garlic and oil.  Heaven… and great on a cold miserable day…like we have here in Florida when it drops below seventy-five.